Chibi Free HolidayYeah Right
by Youkai Of Hearts
Summary: Oneshot maybe? Saiyuki Chibi...may look adorable but can be very deadly...imagine what their like on a holiday to London? Be warned language and cuteness. I still think this one isn't good though but worth a try. I need a review to know...
1. Bus Trip Disaster

**Chibi Free Holiday Chapter One**

Right time for a holiday. What? What would you do if you were pestered everyday by small deformed little creatures, one with a personal problem? One with an eating disorder. Another with a handsome charm and the last one is a complete pervert...

You don't want to know how low I've gone in the last couple of months…so I've decided to go on one of the boring school trip for two weeks…with no chibi what so ever. I swear if I see another deformed…big, sparkly eyed chibi who says I want cigarettes…I'm going to scream.

My friends decided to come too…wait their already going…I was just sitting happily on the bus listening to my Mp3…everything was going very well at least it was…

**Trip Bus disaster**

'How can you see into my eyes like open doors?

Breathe in you down into my core where I become so numb…'

Ha the joys of Evanescence and bring me to live. I love the original song. And enjoying my Chibi free holiday…I sat beside Sarah as I stared out into the window with a happy smile on my face.

'Yes I'm free for two weeks no more Chibi…'

I noticed a little shuffle in my bag at my feet; I ignored it thinking it was my imagination. Sarah looked over at me and said to me "You look a little bit cheerful?" I turned to her and answered.

"Yeah in a matter in fact I am"

"How come? This trip is a bore fest"

"Because I needed to get out of my house…I got bored, I needed to get outta there before my brain melts" My friend shrugged and turned away. I looked out the window watching the world pass by as I continue to listen.

Another bit of movement at my feet. I look down. Is my bag moving? No it can't be…can it? I made sure I locked the door. As my bag continued to move I took the ear plugs out and narrowed my eyes. I just had to give in to curiosity didn't I?

I wrapped up my ear plugs around my Mp3 and brought my bag up unto my knee. As I slowly take precautions as I open the buckle and lift the lid. I see a blonde little monk looking at me with angry eyes and then I see a wittle Hakkai looking up also with a little book saying 'How to Enjoy I holiday in London?'

"Hi"

I slowly close my bag and then I decide to re open it again. This time a little paper fan was thrown at me hitting me on the head. And a little shout I think it was "OYI!"

I slam the lid down.

"Are you alright?" I turn to Sarah and smiled

"Yeah I'm fine…" Sarah looked at the little bit of scrambled paper that was wrapped in a little fan shape. I looked at it and snatched it stuffing it back into my bag smacking Sanzo with it in the process. Then locking it, Sarah looked away to try and get a conversation with Phillip who was on the next row of seats across from us.

As soon as Sarah's attention was distracted I turn half of my body near the window and open the bag snatching Sanzo out of the bag. He didn't seem happy about me doing this.

"Sanzo…what the hell are you doing here?" I whispered fiercly as I shock him about.

"Listen Miss Bitch! I am not going to be left a lone with those Youkai in the bag…" I look at him then open the lid again confirming that the monkey king and kappa were there with their big sparkling eyes directed at my face. I closed the lid and began to nag at him again.

"And this is a problem because?"

"If they were at the house alone…then it will interrupt with my important beauty sleep…"

Sanzo…Beauty sleep…

"Since when did you ever get beauty sleep?"

"Months ago"

"What about my beauty sleep?"

"Beauty sleep? You? Don't make me laugh you Nimbus…"

"Nimbus? Isn't that a name of a cloud?"

"Hey!" I look over and see Sarah and Phillip looking at me with puzzled looks on their faces. I look at them with my face bright red "Yes?"

Phillip looked over to my hands, which were currently wrapped around a little Sanzo who is trying desperately to run off into the bag again.

"What's that?" Phillip asked as he continued to get a good view with what's in my hands. An idea soon popped into my head. "Oh this…"

I turn round and fiddled a bit with Sanzo as I heard the many cursing words escaping his mouth. I told him if he didn't cooperate then he can so forget the room service.

I raise Sanzo up in a cup shape with my hands and showed him up to Sarah and Phillip with a piece of a key chain attached to his little robes. Yes you've guessed it I've reached a new low….

"It's a key chain…" Sarah took the little Sanzo keychain off my hands and looked at him with a suspicious look she knows me too well. One time I tried to pull off the biggest scam on my classmate she knew immediately and stopped me from doing it. Pity though it was only a pellet gun.

Sarah then smiled as she pulled his little cheeks it's amazing how stretchy their face is…what you expect their chibi's. Sanzo wasn't so happy I knew I would be regretting it later.

Phillip then took the little chibi off Sarah's hands and stared at him. Sanzo turned red a little bit. Phillip looked at me with an innocent face.

"Why's it turning red?"

"It's…It takes in thermal energy…he, he, he, he, heh" It was the only thing I could come up with. What would you say if a little annoying chibi turns red? Say his heads a tomato?

Phillip turned his head back to the little chibi as he kept admiring it and the fact that Sanzo isn't happy about this but in a way…It's so enjoyable to see Sanzo suffer…

"Well he's popular…" I jumped and looked to my shoulder to see little Hakkai sitting on it I gave him a terrifying glare.

"Care to tell me how the heck you got out of my bag?" Hakkai jumped off my shoulder and jumped his little body unto my lap.

"I forced it open…oh dear…" I looked over when Hakkai say's 'Oh dear' then that means that a catastrophe was taking place. I turn my head over to see that Phillip was no longer holding Sanzo. I jumped in horror.

I looked to the back to see Sanzo spinning round and round in Simon Duddy's hand. That is so not good especially when Sanzo's been cheeked pulled.

"What an ugly little doll…it's bald…" I'm sure I seen a little vein appears on Sanzo's big adorable head. A big one the size of Glasgow.

Then Simon threw him to the opposite side of the bus. I'm pretty sure he landed on the floor near the stairs.

Hakkai tugged my T-shirt "Shouldn't we…"

"Nah the exercise will do him some good…He's alright…" I assured him. If Sanzo could survive being run over by a car then he can surely survive being thrown.

"One question?" Hakkai looked up at me with an adorable face with his green eyes. I looked down on him.

"Would you happen to have a beeper saying 'Oh look Girl on holiday…Let's ruin it…" Hakkai looked down on his feet with a red expression I wait for my answer.

"Sanzo's idea…" I sigh I should've known.

I feel a little tap on my shoulder…what now…"Um…you're key chain is walking…" I turn blue and jump up leaving Hakkai falling back into the bag.

Sanzo was walking up the bus way to Simon Duddy. Simon just looked down on him and turned blue. I can't believe this my self. As I can hear the countless screams of Sanzo's victim I stood up and ran over.

He was literally biting Simon's head off. So I went up and snatched the little I know I'm going to regret this, _sweetie_ off Simon before eating him alive.

"Simon…" Simon looks up at me while hugging Gareth who was beside him. "Please for your own safety and mine…don't tease my keys…it is programmed to attack you" I walk off feeling embarrassed with myself.

As I sat back down Sarah and Phillip were looking at me I look at them with a narrow face. "What…"

As they slowly turn away I lift up the little monk and snapped at him.

"You do that again and I will give you a grim holiday…"

**To Be Continued**

**Sanzo's Guardian Angel: **I felt like doing a little Chibi one…nice and adorable…pretty lame though


	2. Ship Of Torture

**Chibi Free Holiday Chapter Two**

I must be in hell…god what I have I done to accept this punishment? I know I haven't exactly been a good girl lately… (And I'm not a good girl) but honestly punishing me with four chibi's is not exactly what I would have imagined as good punishment…

I am not going to survive this…never after what happened on the ship…I am never setting foot on a it again with those four their a complete wrecking crew and I had yet another surprise……

**Ship of Torture**

Enter the room, close door behind me. Safe…should I unleash the four criminals in my handbag? Might as well. I open the lid and turn it upside down watching the four little juveniles fall out of my bag.

"OW!" I look down and see that there were only three of them, Hakkai, Sanzo and Gojyo…where's Goku? I search round in my handbag to find him…how can a little chibi that size be able to disappear.

A little tug on my T-shirt I look down to see little Hakkai with the tiny adorable smile he points up.

"I think you should check your coat pocket?" I dip my hand into my pocket, he was right there is someone in there, I lift the chibi gently. It was Goku…why was he in my pocket…I don't remember seeing him jump into my pocket.

Little Goku yawns, his mouth getting bigger and bigger…for a little guy he has very big teeth…I look in to his miniature big mouth….then it closes…for a little chibi who cries for food he's really adorable. Might as well let him sleep in my trouser pocket for a little bit longer. I gently place him in my pocket then hung my coat at the door to the room.

I look back unto the bed where I settled my suitcase. I see little Gojyo bouncing in my bed up then back down again, then jumping again taking flit until he falls off the bed making a giant thud on the ground.

"Sniff…sniff" he whimpers. Oh great he's doing it isn't he…trying to get my attention again. I could tell he was faking it. He looks over to me with those big eyes. There's water coming out making them all sparkly. He raises his little arms up to me and puts on this pathetic baby voice.

"Pwease pwick mwe up" I sigh, grabbing the little red chibi by his blue jacket and setting him unto the bed again, he then shacks off the act and glare at me angrily.

"What no kiss, no 'you alright'" I frown back at him, he must be jealous because I put Goku into my pocket. I can still see his cute head peeping out of my pocket.

"You only asked me to pick you up…and I did it, I picked you up" he sat on the bed, arms crossed with the little frown on his face as he continued to mumble.

Is it just me or do I hear a little creak? I look to the door to see it open and a little Sanzo about to tip toe out…I snuck up behind and grabbed the little pain as I brought him up to eye level.

"And where you going?" I asked as I quickly closed the door, so that none of the people would think that I'm crazy or anything.

He brings out his tiny paper fan and tries to hit me with it. I took the fan off him proving that it was useless. And I settled him back on the bed. I placed my hand on my hips, waiting for my answer.

"I want cigarettes" he replied boldly. I sighed and then glared at him angrily.

"Now I think I had this little conversation with you before…no cigarettes…cause it makes me choke to death and I hate the smoke, plus it's bad for you, I think your familiar with the causes of smoking don't you? Besides how are you even going to smoke them anyway?" He then gave me a frown…a little idea has now entered in his little brain.

"If I can't buy them…you'll have to go for me…" He brought out my wallet and drags his credit card out. I looked at it and picked it up…how did they even out this thing in my wallet anyway? Before I could finish the debate there was a little knock on my door. I grabbed Sanzo and stuffed him in my purse, Gojyo and Hakkai crawled under my bed so they were alright.

I walked over and opened the door. It was a staff member with a tray with tea and coke, and a couple of sandwiches.

"Here's your tea and snacks plus a can of coke…" I looked up at him.

"Huh I didn't…." I looked back to see little Hakkai plunging his head back under the bed. Off course I should've known. I turned back and then smiled.

"Off course thank you very much, how much?" he looked at me for a moment as I took the tray and settled it on the table.

"Your part of the school party so you don't have to pay" he walked away and I quickly closed the door. I see that little Hakkai was already at the coffee with four mini cups and Gojyo already snaking on the sandwiches. Sanzo was still trying to climb out of my bag.

I figured that I should wake up Goku before the sandwiches are gone, so I took him gently out of my pocket and pulled his little cheek. He woke up with a tear streaming down his face. He was about to cry until I pointed my finger towards the sandwiches which in turn were being devoured by the kappa. He turns round and begins to panic as I watch him jump out of my hand unto the bed then wrestling Gojyo for the last sandwich. Like tug of war but only Chibi style.

I walk over to my suitcase. Hakkai jumps in shock, runs over and stands in front of my suitcase with his little arms wide across, defending it.

"For the love of Buddha I beg of you to not open this suitcase" he begs. I look down on him then looked at him suspiciously.

"Why…what have you put into my suitcase…?" Hakkai smiles with his eyes closed and sweated a bit.

"Listen if it wasn't dangerous I wouldn't be here would I?" I look down on him again and placed my hand around his little tummy and lifting him up to my eyes level.

"Wait here" I placed Hakkai on my shoulder and slowly placed my hands on the lock of my suitcase and gently raised the lid. My eyes widened as me and Hakkai went pale. There was a little Kougaiji, Yaone, Doku and Lirin in my suitcase they all looked up at me and waved happily. I slammed the lid down and looked back to Hakkai.

"So…That's why you didn't want me to open the lid…what are they doing in there?" I asked as I frowned at Chibi Hakkai. He sweated a bit and shrugged. There was a strange noise in my suitcase now…it's growling…can a suitcase growl? No I didn't think so… I opened the lid seeing Lirin jumping into the air and grabbing me by my neck.

"I may be small and adorable but I'm still the dangerous sweat Lirin!" I looked at her as I tug her away from my neck "So I can see…now behave!" I roared. I settled her back on the bed as soon as she seen Goku and Gojyo fighting over the sandwich she immediately rushed over and took part in it. Yaone walked over to Hakkai who has now went back with pouring the tea.

Doku is just lying on my bed trying to breath I think? And Kou is just trying to help Sanzo out of the bag…I need a miracle…to survive this trip…

**To Be Continued**

**Sanzo's Guardian Angel: **Again just felt like doing this…No I haven't Abandoned **Nightmares **I'm suffering Writers block again…can anyone help or know a cure for that?


	3. Nightmares and Curse of the Dust Bunnies

**Chibi Free Holiday Chapter Three**

One's enough, Two's a crowd, Three's a charm, Four's a group, but Eight is a wreaking crew. If I thought that a day on the boat was troublesome. Then the night would be a very relaxing time…That's what I thought…

Oh but how wrong I was… I tried to sleep really I did… but I didn't realize that it was going to end up like this…

**Nightmares and Curse of the Dust Bunnies**

Oh how I love to get into my bed and drift off to sleep…but sadly it's an hour or two away from my reach. I lay down on the bed as I slowly read a magazine…I found it gathering dust in my suitcase.

The little terrors are rather quiet…too quiet…what is that laying on the table across the room? Oh it's just Goku wearing a rabbit costume…wait hang on…hold the phone…

I looked over again to confirm my suspicions…and yet to my surprise he is wearing a rabbit costume…how can they get clothing to fit them that size? I place my magazine on the bed and began to sneak over gently placing my feet onto the floor…I walked over and pocked him a bit…He turns round and begins to turn red.

"Meep" he went as I bended down to see his eyes getting bigger and more sparkly not to mention watery…

"I'm I even going to ask…" I placed my hand on my forehead, tiredness rushing through…I'm getting quite annoyed now. He runs up to me and jumps into my hand as he took off the bunny costume.

"I'm scared…" he cries as he hugs my neck, I sighed…what have the little monsters done now? Have they finally found a pixie and asked her to make my life more of a misery? Or maybe they've found Aladdin's magic lamp? Maybe one of them has finally snapped and decided to become the chibi version of Jason, the one with the hockey mask and chain saw, along with a sharp machete.

"Why what have they done now?" I asked as I gently tugged him off my neck, Goku continued to cry, turning my hand into an endless pond of tears. As the liquid continued to dribble off my hand Goku closed his eyes and replied as the tears continued to shoot out like bullets…aww and I just cleaned up the mess from the coke accident…

"Gojyo was telling this scary story…" he explained I patted his tiny shoulder, to show that I care, for once.

"A…and now…I think the dust bunnies are coming after me………waaaaaaaaaaaaah! So I dressed up as a bunny so they won't attack me with their songs of death…" I thought for a bit…Dust bunnies…wasn't their song just 'Some where over the rainbow'? Doesn't he mean the Siren's?

"Goku don't you mean the Siren's?" He looked up at me the tears still flowing from his beady eyes…

"Siren's?"

"Yeah…Siren's…their mythical creatures that lead sailors to death by their melody…Dust bunnies are just…" Then Goku jumped onto his feet and began to panic even more.

"You mean their…their also mythical dragons?" I didn't expect that?

"Ummm I'm not sure that they're a type of dragon…"

"Another form of Dust Bunny?"

"Goku...that's not what I…" But before I could finish he jumped of and ran away screaming…I let my arms fall down limp with a shocked …what has Gojyo told that little Monkey?

Oh well I figured that Ill relax and let Goku realizes it later. Now I'll think I relax and continue to read my magazine…hold on…I turn round to see that my magazine is no longer sitting on my bed. Wait there it is…its slowly running away…can a magazine run away? No I didn't think so…

I walked after it and slowly raised the magazine up to see a very angry youkai chibi hanging on to it. Not wanting to let go…yes its Kou…

"What are you doing?" I began to shack the magazine so that Kou could then fall down on the bed as I walked over to it still trying to shack him off.

"I want to read…do you mind!" Kou seemed very angry at me. I brought the magazine above my head and frowned at him.

"But I was reading it first" Kou then shrugged and began to shack himself about a bit I let the magazine go and made him fall unto the floor with the magazine on top of him. I bended down and lifted the magazine.

"You know I have a little cousin a bit like you and I'm sure that he knows the meaning of don't annoy Big Cuz when she is trying to find peace" Kou then just looked up at me with the angry annoyed expression written on his face. Then there was a little tap on my shoulder. Who could it be than the unbearable Lirin.

"Can we go to the restaurant?" she pleaded innocently. Then there was another tap on my opposite shoulder and there I see Hakkai with a smile. He removed a list from his tiny pocket.

"And can we also do a couple of things while we're here?" Then there was something crawling up my leg I look down to see Sanzo with a frown on his face. "No cigarettes!" then Sanzo shock his head.

"I don't want any cigarettes…" wha? Did I just hear him right…Sanzo…saying he doesn't want cigarettes…What is he planning?

"What's the catch?" I asked as I frowned at him.

"No catch…can we leave?" I sighed, I wish he was like this all the time…but I wondered if Goku has recovered from that little scare. I looked round the raised my hand to shout.

"Goku! We're going out you want a come?" I see his little head peeping round the corner of the bed and running swiftly to my hand as I laid it unto the ground so he can run unto. I look over to Yaone who was writing something on a huge piece of paper.

"Yaone you're in charge until I come back…" I walked out of the room closing the door securely and walking down the hallway.

"Eh hem!" I look down to see Sanzo still latched around my leg. I forgot he was there so I picked him up and stuffed him into my pocket at the right side; Hakkai, Goku and Lirin have disappeared into my handbag. I can hear the sounds of Goku whimpering in it.

"Hmmm let's see…" I looked round as I continued to journey through the passageways. Until I hear a very familiar voice behind me…

"Aaaaah there's the little shit head" I turned round to see Simon Duddy behind me with a big grin on his face. I sighed heavily.

'Oh great here comes the walking disaster' I thought as I placed my hands unto my hips. He looked down to see Sanzo in my pocket. I think he's forgotten the incident earlier.

"Agh! And the ugly, bald headed doll…where did you find him in…a charity shop?" I didn't reply but turned round and walked on. Sanzo was now pissed off he looks up at me with those big chibi eyes.

"Can I kill the fuck out of him?" I looked down and replied sharply "No"

"Come on…we can just say that a crazed lunatic decided to work out…" Right at this point I am going to ignore both idiots.

I feel like my life is about to end. No literally I do…

"Hey I think it just blinked at me…,"

"What is it anyway? It looks adorable…"

My eyes widened as I entered the dining area…I see four young ladies staring at a little red headed doll in the centre of the table striking a pose. He looks very familiar…red head…twitching antenna's…and a little face that made me swallow my pride.

I ran over to the table out of breath I looked at the four ladies they were defiantly his type but sadly they're a group of prosties? Why do I say that instead of Prostitutes? How do I know their prostitutes? Because they all have a little badge on the right side of the shirt saying 'Wildest Prostitutes'

"Excuse I think I left my doll here…" I closed my eyes forcing a nervous smile as I pointed at the red cockroach that I'm about to kill…and I can't believe I just said that… one of the ladies looked at me and smiled as she lifted Gojyo and placed him into my hands. She gave me a wink.

"There you go…why don't you come to the bar sometime cutie?" she smirked and placed her mouth on my cheek giving me a kiss. I blushed and turned away slowly. She kissed me, my life is ruined… then as I left the dining area I broke out into a dash and ran into the toilets slamming one of the cubicle doors shut. I slide down on the door and landed on the floor.

I never thought that there were a group of Lesis would appear on the boat.

"Hey what are you doing I could've nailed it!" I lift Gojyo up with my eyes closed and my vein felt like it was going to pop. I opened the bag and took out a box of dental floss as I pulled out a long stripe and snapping it I tied one end around Gojyo's foot while I held the other. My form of torture is ready.

I looked into the bag and looked at Hakkai.

"Hakkai can you do the honors?" knowing what I meant Hakkai jumped out of the bag and stood at the edge of the toilet to where the handle was and tried to jump up to pull it. Sadly he wasn't tall enough.

"Goku could you give me a hand…?" Goku peeped his head out he started to look around his surroundings being cautious. He looked at Hakkai with his eyes big and wide again.

"The dust bunnies aren't about are they?" Lirin then jumped up and slammed Goku down on the head using him as a launch pad. "If you aren't going to do it then I will" my guess is Lirin is angry from hunger…

She jumped unto the toilet and jumped on Hakkai's shoulders willing to pull the handle.

"Right…let us begin…" I start to lower the little kappa down slowly. "Wait…hang on please let me explain…" I look over to Lirin and shock my head she had a happy grin and pulled the handle… as the sudden sound of water started to fill the area I slowly lowered Gojyo down. He screamed as I continued.

"Please let me go I promise I'll never do it again…" his little arms waving madly. In a way it is very adorable to see Gojyo…and I'd be even happier if I would let him go down but then again…that way out would be too easy for him…

"Please put me down…" he begged I smirked at him evilly.

"Okay" I let the string go down super fast until I stopped him facing the water he began to cry letting tears go out of his eyes. Inside I was laughing horribly…I know it's cruel but at the end of the torture there can be some laughter. I raised my hand signaling to stop.

"Sorry my finger slipped…so have you learned your lesson?" Gojyo nodded as he continued to shoot the tears around the place some of those tears splattering and bursting unto my black dragon skull T-shirt.

So I untied Gojyo and placed him in my bag again, Hakkai and Lirin jumped in as well. I walked out of the bathroom. To my shock Sarah was there. She looked at me then busted out into laughter.

"What is it?" She dragged me to the mirror and I looked in seeing lipstick on my face, I turned red. "What happened to you?" I took out a tissue and ran it under the tap. I took it out from the tap and slapped it on my face rubbing the lipstick off. Damn Lesbian…

"Nothing… see you later" I ran out and went to where they held their restaurants. I looked round…Chinese takeaway might do…I entered through the doors and walked up to the counter. A man went up to me…

"Can I take your order…?" I looked up at the menu...analyzing it for awhile.

"Yes I'll have the miso soup, Chinese spare ribs, sausages dipped in Chinese sauce, Ramen noodles and Chinese chicken…" the man looked at me for a minute then went to the back of the kitchen to get it ready. Yes I know…strange but then again I could be giving it to eight strange little chibi's who have a big stomach.

"Hey what you doing here?" I turned round to see Phillip looking at me with his eyes wide. I know he never seen me in a Chinese takeaway before.

"That'll be ten pounds please…" I turned over and handed him the golden credit card that Sanzo handed to me earlier. He took it and charged the meal on to it.

"Just getting something to eat…" Phillip looked at the bag as the card was handed back to me. "It's like you getting yourself a feast by the looks of it"

"Yeah" I laughed a bit as I took the bag and left the take away leaving Phillip by himself. "I'll see you later kay?"

**To Be Continued**

**Sanzo's Guardian Angel: **Hah I just love making the protagonist's life a misery, sorry about the Gojyo abuse…he deserves it I think, This one is a little bit longer…don't worry they'll be off the boat as soon as I give a certain young man some horror from our Sanzo…one more thing…Sanzo and the gang, including the member of staff and Lesbian's, Simon, Sarah, Phillip and some other class mates including the protagonist are real characters.

Simon is an annoyance this is what I want to do to him if I ever do…until the next Chappie…see yeah then


	4. Where Sanzo and return of the dust bunny

**Chibi Free Holiday Chapter Four**

So far I am suffering from shock, honestly I might need to go and take therapy or luckily…maybe my brother James wouldn't mind and drive me into an insane asylum. I need a miracle…please…please…

Anything to get me out of this misery…I'm going to cry…

Why, why, must I suffer?

**Where's Sanzo and Return of the Dust Bunnies**

Ring, ring, ring goes my phone as I wait for an answer, comes on James pick up the phone…come on bro…It was late and I was about to go to bed…

"Hello"

"James…Niisan!" I sighed in relief, as Goku cuddles up with Hakkai, scared and still terrified of the dust bunnies coming to get him.

"Oh sis how you enjoying London"

"I won't be there for another couple of hours… I have a problem…,"

"Really? What is it?"

"The chibi's have appeared…,"

"How?" He asks as I can hear the shouts from behind, must be a wild party. A wild party with out me? That little…

"That's what I want to ask you…,"

"I have no idea sorry sis…"

Goku's now cuddling onto my neck, muttering 'The Dust Bunnies are coming to get me' over and over again it's driving me insane. I removed him from my neck and gently settled him unto the pillow, Hakkai massaging his little shoulders.

"Have you been drinking?" he hesitated for a bit then took a deep breath and replied soft and gently "No"

"Don't lie I can hear the sound of screams and shouts…you big fat liar"

"If I recall you drank once yourself…,"

"That was only because it was my first try…"

"Yeah and that was also when the little chibi started to appear and I heard you saying…'Holy Crap their little deformed creatures coming out of my Wardrobe to Shangri La' Then you threw down the bottle"

Yeah that was partly true…that was the first and last time I had a drink of alcohol. I knew that thought would come back to haunt me…It was just 'The Chronicles of Narnia' All over again only they forgot the part of 'The Alcoholic idiot's (Me & James), The Chibi's (Them) and the broken wardrobe'

I am now seeing a huge tennis ball flying past me with a little chibi tied on it… How do I know that? Because I can here the screaming chibi as the ball zoomed by. I think it was Gojyo…I told another certain Chibi to continue the punishment after that incident with the duck tape…how he ever got duck tape stuck unto that furry cat I'll never know…other than that… the furry cat how it got on I would tell the owner to keep it in the room other than let it roam free…but it wasn't my business and I didn't care…Now the cat looks like a Chihuahua

Poor thing…

"Doku fire that ball somewhere else sweetie…Talking on the phone here!" I shouted as I looked over. Doku and Kou ran past with a huge tennis racket like two little merry workers.

"Yes!" Said Doku as he raised the racket down with his bow and knocked the lamp over, I jumped and grabbed it.

"Watch where you're aiming that thing huh? Someone could get hurt?" He ran off, Kou bowed down again, even though he was a pain earlier and burned my Magazine in a cinder, which I am still pissed off about by the way; he was actually an adorable little guy. He smiled happily "Sorry Ma'm"

"You're enjoying yourself aren't you?"

"Yes I am I'm having a wonderful time…" and to think this was only the journey to the country…now I'm actually worried about when we get there to London…will we ever come back in one piece?

"Sorry Bro…the little guys are playing tennis…," Now Goku is clinging to my leg…dammit, get off…

"In the tennis court?" is he insane…how can they even play tennis…I'd be hulled off to the guys in white lab coats and a sicko who'd want me to take my clothes off…eeeeh the thought of it is now sending shivers down my spin.

"No do you think that people will not notice a couple of cute chibi's flinging a tennis racket and smash the ship window's may I mention the captain was enjoying a wonderful martini until, WHAM…" I slammed my hand unto the table sending millions of vibrations, causing Yaone to fall of the table and landing on the floor, as a cup came down on her. Yaone was starting to move around with the cup on top of her.

"_Death by Tennis Racket!_"

"Wait their playing it in doors?" Took him long enough.

"Yes Niisan! There's a certain Chibi being tortured to death…,"

"_Not Yaone!_" Oh for the love of…

"No…only Gojyo…,"

"Aww that's alright then" he bellowed out.

"Well I'll talk to you later Niisan…bye" I shut the phone off and fell backwards unto the bed. I sighed heavily…I'm in hell there's no mistake…I must be dreaming…I close my eyes hoping I'd wake up from this nightmare…I open…sadly seeing Hakkai peering over me in green pajamas…what is it with the little pajamas anyway? What do they have a mini Taylor for their entire designer needs? Or have they decided to snag one of Mr. Fuzzes clothes…I mean their almost the same height.

"Have you seen Sanzo?" Oh sugar my trouser pocket. I stood up and rushed over to where I left the trousers. He's not there…oh no…where could he be?

I hear a scream behind me I turned round to see Goku in…yellow pajamas…he jumps up and grabs my neck again…honestly what have they done brought their complete wardrobe of essentials with them?

"_The Dust Bunnies are coming to get me!_" Not again…I looked over to the bed to see a little bunny rabbit a little bit smaller than them. I sighed.

"Goku that is just a normal stuffed rabbit" He looked up at me "Nu uh! It moved it tried to subdue me!" he cries out…Right time to settle this once and for all… I settled Goku onto the table as I walked over and lifted the rabbit up by its little fluffy back.

"Look it is not a dust bunny…see it's a stuffed bunny…S.T.U.F.F.E.D. B.U.N.N.Y" I look down to see it's head looking at me…It's moving…I dropped it and ran over jumping unto the chair, Goku shivering as he jumped unto my shoulder.

"_It's alive…It's alive!_"

Now entering Sanzo, He was wobbling down the hallway…What was he doing down there I will never know…he then stopped in front of a certain door…it was open this Sanzo could tell. He was a very good expert at knowing when someone hasn't locked their door…not securely like I do it anyway…

He nudges the door and slowly opens it…he smirks to see his victim lying on the bed soundly asleep…perfect for that little droopy eyes priest…it was Simon…he crept in and closed the door, what ever he was planning to do couldn't be good… he takes out a very weird hockey mask but there was one problem…it looked like Jason's from 'Friday the 13th' but it had bunny ears…why did Sanzo have a mask like Jason's with bunny ear's? Was it a new fab he had in mind? New fashion statement? He then shuffles round his robes and brings out a little buzzer he pressed the big red button and purple electricity began to shutter making the usual sound.

H walked closer to the sleeping giant and jumped unto his bed. Simon's eyes began to flutter, he turned blue.

"So I'm bald am I?" Sanzo sounded very creepy with the put on voice that he mimicked from Freddy Crugar from 'Nightmare from Elms street' (I think that was the name of the movie…) I knew it was a bad idea to let him see those videos…they're not what I describe as Chibiful…ahem wonderful for a Chibi that's obsessed with horror.

"Who…who are you?" Simon hesitated as he pulled the covers up to his mouth. Sanzo then was covered by violet flames as he suddenly began to get bigger and bigger.

"I'm King of The Dust Bunnies!" he roared. As he began to attack his prey as he pressed the beeper into Simon sending him in a _shocking_ state…no I'm serious he did say that and he did hurt Simon…no not physically…Mentally…

I didn't think he was Chibi enough…ahem! I mean Man enough to pull it off…Why do I keep saying Chibi?

Back to the problem at hand… as I mentioned before…yes the bunny was moving…but I noticed a little laugh coming from the little drawers as it slowly opened...unleashing a little insane Chibi Nii...yes the perverted doctor with the weird rabbit and strange sense of humor. He stood behind the bunny as it went motionless.

"I knew you'd like it" I started to frown then there was a sound of an alarm. I looked down to see Hakkai and Yaone dressed in a Priest and Nun's outfit…I swear it's true he even has the little hat and beard. He held a bible.

"Yaone prepare the exorcism!" Yaone nodded…wait exorcism…? Yaone brought out a huge jar saying 'Holy Water' where did they get that…how can they even bring out a jar that is bigger than them? Then she brings out a giant cross that was a bout the size of a tennis racket…

"Right…shall we?" Hakkai handed Yaone the bible as she began to read out of it. As Hakkai was doing something with the holy water. He then brings out this giant water blaster and points it at the rabbit.

"Eat Holy water you demon of seduction!" he then begins to fire, as many water shots where being splats unto the floor. The rabbit continued to run. I picked up the bottle and observed it.

'Ingredients…urine from seven virgins…ah…'

"Yaone the holy cross!" Yaone raised the holy cross and began to shiver as the rabbit bounced unto her…poor thing…

There was a knock on my door I walked over as the chibi began to panic and all crawled under the bed except Goku I placed him in my chest pocket.

It was Gareth Cooke…why would one of Simon's minions…be at my door…

"And can I help you?" Gareth grabbed my wrist and dragged me down the hallway until we reached Simon's room. Why did he bring me to Simon's room…Oh well might as well see what's wrong. He opened the door as it made its creak, I see Simon sitting in a corner with his knees tucked against his chest.

"He says that this attacked him…" he brings out a little surprise…one I will exterminate later…it was Sanzo with a set of keys attached to him.

"And I think this belongs to you…" I looked at Simon as he began to quiver. Muttering very slowly 'The Dust Bunnies are coming to get me' not this again…What has Sanzo dine to him…more importantly how can a boy, who's height is 6.0 be over powered by a chibi who isn't even half his size.

"What happened to him may I ask?" Gareth looks back and replies "He said he was attacked by the 'King of the Dust Bunnies' but he must've suffered a nightmare…really attacked by a key chain…" I smiled and laughed lightly. "Yeah"

Now it's morning and Sanzo's gone missing again…I looked round every where…the dining area, the restaurants…everywhere.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!" that sounded like it came from the gift store I ran over to see the staff member lying on the floor, with Sanzo standing on the desk with a vein on his head. I then see him wondering to the shelf with cigarettes and take a box out. I frowned as I walked over and grabbed them off.

"Sanzo!" He then frowns with those droopy eyes. I then sighed again "Alright you can have it…as long as you don't pull off another stunt…" he nods as he jumps into my pocket as another staff member walked over.

"I'd like to take these please" he ran the packet under the scanner…funny he doesn't even ask for my age. I took the packet happily. As I excited the gift store I looked down on Sanzo who was peaking out of my coat pocket I look down on him and narrowed my eyes.

"Your lucky that your even getting this at all" Until I heard a voice that made me jump.

"I can't believe you!" I turn round to see two of my teachers. Mrs. Thompson and Mr. Jones. It's very rare to see them with each other…even though one of them is older than the other. Mrs. Thompson is older…even though she's the shortest of the three…yes I'm taller than her

"I always thought you were a responsible student…and now I find you buying cigarettes" Mr. Jones shouted as he took the packet off me I looked up and then started to play the innocent act…I thought for a minute then something came into my mind.

"But their not mine…Mr. Wilson told me to get them for him" then Mrs. Thompson sighed and blurted out "I should've known…go on join the others…I'll have a chat with Mr. Wilson" Mr. Jones looked at me suspiciously then he and Mrs. Thompson left to find the other teacher…

I look down to Sanzo seeing a blank expression on his face as he watches his precious treat out of his reach I look down and rubbed my finger on his little head.

"There, there…"

Poor little guy…

**To Be Continued**

**Sanzo's Guardian Angel: **Aww Poor Sanzo…I was supposed to say that Sanzo and other chibi's including staff members are not real. However other character's including the Protagonist do exist. I love making Sano's life a misery as well. Please review if you like it?


	5. Mission: To make my life a hell hole

**Chibi Free Holiday Chapter Five**

Right I am so fed up with this…what is it with them…their not eight anymore…Their nine… Ten if you include the moving rabbit…this sucks…I am now hoping that a go into a coma…because these evil little creatures are sent by God to make my life a living hell…

**Mission: To make my life a hell hole**

The bus trip wasn't very nice…I had to sit beside Simon…why the teacher has been setting people is beyond me…not only that but Mr. Wilson kept nagging at me at the back seat…he's like the double of John Cleese he was sitting beside Mr. Jones..

"And that's why you should ask a student to buy cigarettes…" Mr. Jones didn't sound too pleased with Mr. Wilson.

"For god sake man I keep telling you I didn't ask her to buy me cigarettes!" I kept glancing out the window. Simon kept starring at my bad…why is he looking at my bag…I have no idea. I dip my hand into the bag as I opened it and took out Sanzo; Simon flinched and screamed at the top of his lungs. I starred at him, also half of the others that were around.

I twisted my body towards the window and held Sanzo,

"Sanzo what in the world have you done…you completely dramatized him…" Sanzo shrugged trying to play the innocent game with me…like hell he's innocent…one time he tried to pull off a plan once…sadly my granny's dog, Sam wasn't going to be very corporative with him and the wheel of fiery doom.

The bag's moving again, I look and open it seeing chibi youkai Hakkai searching for something. The rest were hiding, scared of the creature with the long elf ears in front of them.

"Where are my ear cuffs…" he asks as he scrounges round the many contents in my bag. There goes my diary…and my box of empty home made cookies…my photographs of kittens…wait hang on…I look in as little Hakkai has now successfully found his ear cuffs I lifted the packet of photos that said 'Kitten' on it. Sanzo looked with a blank expression…like that isn't new. I opened it to see a picture with a kitten playing with wool…it's Mittens!

Now I know where those pictures of Mittens went…this just proves something today…what that is I will keep to myself…

As the bus comes to a gentle stop I look out the window to see a very large complex that was our hotel…I sighed in relief this should prove relaxing…I heard Mrs. Thompson saying that there were swimming pools and spas, along with very interesting scenery and courts along with a giant football field and a couple of things for the men as well…but I will not state them…I feel dirty enough…

I enter the room and gently close the door shut as I settled the bag on the bed…it was a very nice place to stay in actually…imagining the ship cabins…it'd be twice as big as that…and all the students are given a room for themselves…now there's a deal I wouldn't mind…it'd be nice to relax…

Oh wait…'if' I can relax that is…

I notice something clinging to my leg…hmmm? I wonder…I look down to see little Lirin looking up at my with those big eyes…oh how can those eyes get big…not to mention that glittery?

"_Can we go and eat!_" I sighed

"No!" Now I see Gojyo pointing out at the window standing on the balcony pointing down to the little bar saying 'Wildest Prostitutes'

"Can we go down there?"

"No!"

I look out over the balcony to see the swimming pool. I smiled and went to my suitcase opening it and lifting out my swimming bag. I went into the bathroom only to see the perverted kappa tip toeing after me…I turned round and glared at him.

"Defiantly not!"

I rushed in and slammed the door hearing a bang in the process. I open my bag and looked through it to find my violet swimming costume. No that's my hair brush…I set it on the counter in front of me, still not it…found my goggles…set them on the counter…ah here it is…I slip my jeans off along with my under wear and tugged them up not pulling it over my chest yet…have to get rid of my shirt and other things First.

As I remove my t-shirt and other essential, I hear rustling in the background…I look behind me…I see a little tree…it moves again as there was a sneezing sound coming from it…can a tree sneeze? No I thought so…I slowly walk over covering my upper body with the black t-shirt in front. I move a tiny bit of the branches.

I see a little Homura with a little bit of blood dribbling down his nose…he went bright red. "That was so beautiful…" he muttered. I let go of the branches slamming it into his face and sending him flying out an open window hitting a tree with a great thud. I peered out the window to see the remains of the little pervert on the ground seeing a slight twitch from his left leg. I slowly closed the window and locked it…

I took off my other essentials and pull the chest part of my bathing costume over my chest and letting out a big sigh.

As soon as I got finished with operation changing. I grabbed my goggles and towel as I proceeded opening the door and walked out…seeing that none of the chibi's are in the room. Phew maybe today I can get some quality time too myself.

I snuck a little bit to the door…they might be asleep…or better might've left me along and are now torturing another poor soul…I smiled as I opened the door.

"May we accompany you" I jumped as I turned round to see a little Hakkai in swimming shorts, again they are green…what is it with them and wearing the same colour? It wouldn't be too difficult to add other colours into their wardrobes would it…would it kill their deceased Tyler to make clothing in a different colour? I see a little Goku and the possessed bunny on my other shoulder.

There is something clutching unto my leg…I look down for observation…its Gojyo…he is hugging and rubbing his head on my leg…_Bloody fucking pervert get off my leg_!

"What beautiful, Sexy, smooth legs you have" he says with a cheery smile. I look down and am now going to proceed to the next step in operation: Remove Pervert. I lift my leg and shook it around a bit until he lets go. He then drops down as I walk out of the room with the three chibi's continuing to sit on my shoulder.

"Behave yourself now!" I ordered as I closed the door seeing Gojyo sitting down, folding his arms and muttering curse words to himself.

Now at the pool. I lie down working on my tan…peace and quite…

"**CANNON BALL!**" it is now raining as some of the water splashes out of the pool…luckily there is no one about…for me this is a private pool for the students…but no one was going to come in for a while so I might as well enjoy the peace…if I get any…

There is something on my stomach…I look to see Mr. Bunny nipping it…Is Mr. Bunny possessed? He continues to nip. I lift my hand and grab him by his ears.

"Listen Mr. Bunny…" I chucked him into the pool smacking Goku in the process as I see his rubber ring appearing above water…with Goku no longer sitting on it.

Hakkai comes past the rubber ring in a mini canoe…where the heck do they get these little items from?

"You alright Goku?" Mr. Bunny's head is now above water hauling little Goku to the rubber ring.

Hakkai glares at Mr. Bunny "Don't think I have forgotten the last incident Mr. Bunny…" he looked very creepy…are those green flames surrounding him?

"Careful or else Jaws will get you as your next victim…" I commented. Goku jumped and stood on the rubber ring along with Mr. Bunny As they held on to each other to keep balance.

"Jaws?" I sat up ready to explain to the little monkey king and little bunny.

"Yeah haven't you heard of the man eating shark that could swallow a person whole?" Goku and Mr. Bunny both shook their heads. I took a deep breath ready to begin the lesson of the day

"Jaws is a shark bigger than any person or boats…remember the ship we were on…half the size of that…he was a killer that one…he swallowed a hundred people whole leaving no remains… (Exaggerating here) they say that he roams the waters in search of an appetizing meal…when he's found his next victim…their blood is completely splattered unto his giant mouth…they say he's still roaming out there…(Lying of course this isn't horror)"

I see Goku and Mr. Bunny holding unto each other as they shivered. Hakkai just laughed a bit as he went pale.

I smiled as I leaned back…and drifting off for a bit…

**To Be Continued**

**Sanzo's Guardian Angel: **Yes, yes I know this is short…but I'll promise that I'll make the other one longer…I'd like to thank my Nii-san…for helping me out in this…someone asked me to add Homura…so I got that fulfilled…any other suggestions on any other characters and I'll see what I can do…kay? I will make the next chapter longer! Promise! Not as funny as the last one either…


	6. Mission: The End is near, just not now

**Chibi Free Holiday Chapter Six**

At this point I have nothing much to say…but if you ever find little deformed creatures lurking under your bed…then follow these simple steps.

Step One: Be captious all times and throw the Chibi back where it came from.

Step Two: Never let male Chibi's that are known for a reputation to be perverts get a hold of your sexy silky underwear

Step Three: Resist their cuteness at all times don't look them in the eye.

Step Four: Never give them what they want.

And many other steps but I will not bother until the next time…

**Mission: The End is near, just not now**

It is now night time and I am trying desperately to get to sleep. Although just one problem…the chibi's are now telling Ghost stories to each other…why do I get the uneasy feeling that this is going to end in chaos.

The one currently telling the story is Goku…followed by Gojyo, Hakkai, Kou etc, Sanzo on the other hand stated clearly that this is childish and is now currently next to the bedside cabinet.

"Goku…that is so not scary…" Gojyo blurted out, Hakkai just smiled, although Lirin is screaming her head off and is crying as she hugged her brother tightly about to kill him.

"Huh? It is…" Goku snapped

"Oh yeah a story about a guy eating meat buns while squeezing the filling out of them is really scary…right my turn…" Gojyo said as he took the flash light off Goku and placed it firmly under his chin.

"I've got a good chilling story..." I took my gaze off the little campers that were over by the desk and turned it too Sanzo.

"How do you put up with this…?" I asked, Sanzo's droopy eyes just turned to me and he replied "Simple I just shoot them all"

"And then when the farmer turned round…he heard their song of death…then a horrible creature came out…it was…the horrible **_Dust Bunnies_**!" Now I can hear Goku screaming, I can hear the little chibi monkey jumping up and down. I fixed my eyes on the little guy and took my hand grabbing the little monkey and placing him on my hand.

I rubbed his little back "There, there Goku it was only a story…" I can now hear the laughs of Gojyo coming from the ground I looked and seen the red head laughing wickedly as he was currently holding a magazine in his hand.

"That was very cruel Gojyo…" Hakkai said as he made a worried face.

"Eh the monkey wanted to be scared out of his wits didn't he?"

"Yes but not like that!" I stated.

"Hey do you know any good ghost stories?" Lirin chimed as she pointed at me…oh dear… all the chibi's looked at me and then there seemed to be a hyper active reaction to Lirin's suggestion…

"Yes…" I nodded as Goku jumped down unto my knee. Lirin began to jump up and down, what has this child been on, sugar? I knew giving her ten sugar sticks was a bad idea…

"Tell us one, tell us one…" Oh good god…I sighed giving in to their suggestion…if it would make them all quiet. Lirin held the torch and handed it to me…very small…so I gave it back and took out the big one that was in my bag that was lying against the bed.

I turned it on and placed it under my chin.

Okay a ghost story…a ghost story…hm how a bout…

"One day… six students went into a forest; they were going on to a hiking trip. When they reached the forest entrance only to be told by the police officer that it was off limits and that no one was meant to go in. They asked the officer 'why' but he replied 'There have been a couple of disappearances of teenagers on hiking trips and have never been seen again…' but the students didn't listen to him and so they walked off into the woods…not knowing what to expect…then a couple of hours later one of the students got very tired and told the others to go on ahead of her…" Gojyo looked at me with his big crimson eyes.

"What did she look like?" Me and a couple of others sighed of course that perverted kappa would think about the girl…

"She was tall with black hair tied in a braid, green eyes and very pretty…"

"Kanan…" there was a little whisper coming from Hakkai…oh crap….he's taken a trip down memory lane hasn't he, why do I know this cause he's closed his eyes thinking about it…note to self never ever put a character in that description ever again….even if it's for a ghost story.

"Then as the other five were away from their friend they heard a chilling scream…and then when they were…"

**Fast Forward**

There were many wide eyed faces in shock in what I just told them. It was getting late…

"And then when he turned around there standing in front of him was the…" then there was a huge sound which made me jump, everyone screamed at the top of their lungs, well except for Sanzo he was just sitting there still in shock.

I fell of the bed and landed on the floor as all the chibi's continued to run around the room. Lirin and Yaone hid themselves inside a wardrobe. Hakkai in a jar which was sitting on the table. The one that said 'A penny a day keeps a Chibi away', Gojyo just so willingly thrown himself into a bin and crawled into the rubbish. Homura just decided to fly out of the window…he went quit a distance really…and many of the others hid into places I didn't know even existed in this room…

"Um….at least they all found a place to sleep…" I muttered to myself. Sanzo who has now snapped out of his shock and is reading a book looked up and asked me…

"Hey where'd that shity Kami went?"

**Meanwhile at Home**

James walked down the hallway, awake and is now looking for breakfast, He's lucky that he only has a few of the Chibi's there with him and Ian. Yes Ian's there…you see he knows about it as well.

James opened the cupboard until there was an earth quaking sound coming from under him, he walked over to the window and jumps as a flying Homura flew past him and landed on the table.

"AAAAAAAAAAAGH THE APOCOLYPSE IS NIGH!" James ran out of the kitchen and entered the hallway.

"Ian hide Gyokumenkoshu before god comes!"

No that really did happen and yes my Niisan really did say that.

Ian suddenly jumped up from the computer that he was currently upgrading, grabbed Gyokumenkoshu who was painting her finger nails, ran into the toilet and stuffed her into the toilet bowl, ignoring her screaming protests he pulled the lever and flushed her down it. Ian walked out rubbing his hands together and smiled wickedly.

My brother just stared at him menacingly and said "Ian that wasn't what I wanted you to do…"

Ian just smiled and replied cheerfully "Look at it this way…one less Chibi to worry about"

James shrugged his shoulders "Hm good point…How about we celebrate?"

"Sounds good to me…I'll make the necessary phone calls"

**To Be Continued**

**Sanzo's Guardian Angel: **Hi everyone sorry it took me so long, I had a lot of things to get through…thank you for your patience while I did this chapter.Although this chapter isn't as funny as chapter four but I'll try tomake it funny next timebut I like to thank My brother Master Sabbath at helping me with this chapter.Thanls bro. Well see yeah next time!


	7. A Very High Chilling Experience

**Chibi Free Holiday Chapter Seven**

Uh head pains these days…I need to see a doctor and soon…if the Chibi's aren't hallucinations then I don't know what is…

And while I'm at it I'll just throw in this…ahem…

WE CAN NOT ASURE YOU THAT NO CHIBI'S WERE HURT IN THE MAKING OF THIS STORY…

ALTHOUGH WE CAN ASURE YOU THAT THE PROTANGONIST WAS MENTALLY ILL AFTER THIS PRODUTION…

Hm…Didn't know that…

**A Very High Chilling Experience**

I sighed while I sat on my chair, on the bus again who'd thoughtit. Well the little terrors are at the hotel…I made sure that the door was locked this time…but…just to make sure…I looked into my bag… lucky me no chibi…sigh…

"Hmmm…so we're going to the London's eye huh?" I jumped. The person next to me looked at me frightened at my current out burst.

"You alright?" said the boy that was beside me. I looked at him and nodded with a smile plastered to my face. "Um…yeah just a little…chilly…" I hissed.

There was a slight tap on my right shoulder, I froze…no it can't be…I turned my head slowly round to see a little Hakkai smiling "Hello there…" Well I'll be damned…you know if this was a dream then a pretty good old fashioned wake up call would do me some good now…

I closed my eyes tightly hoping that I might wake up now…any moment now… I opened my eyes and turned my head to see Hakkai looking at me with a worried expression…

"Is something wrong?"

The boy next to me looked over my shoulder to see Hakkai sitting on my shoulder, Hakkai looked at the boy. I looked at the boy to see him sweating a bit and his face was going blue…um no wait purple…

Hakkai raised one hand up as he smiled cheerfully "Hello there" The boy then panicked as he fainted in his seat. I poked him in the shoulder the only thing I got was a slight twitch…huh death by cuteness? Didn't think that existed yet…

Two girls were looking at me and I just smiled and giggled a bit as they went back into their business I snatched Hakkai and looked at him, turning my back at the boy and the others.

"Hakkai what the hell are you doing here?" I snapped angrily. Hakkai smiled and cheerfully replied "We came to accompany you…" I blinked in shock…"Wait _we_?" I looked into my handbag, yet I see no one…

"We as in…" Hakkai pointed to my coat pocket…I narrowed my eyes as I peered into the pocket seeing Gojyo and Kou there. Hm funny no Sanzo or Goku…or the others in fact…I looked at Hakkai who was still smiling.

"Um…hello…" I jumped again seeing Yaone on my knees. I narrowed my eyes once again. I should've known…

"We're not troubling you are we?" asked Yaone kindly. I looked at her and smiled nervously "Oh no, no…you're not the one who I would say is troubling me…" I turned my gaze to Hakkai "It's him and the little terrors that are the ones who trouble me…"

"This wasn't my idea it was Sanzo's…"

"And why doesn't his Bitchiness grace us with his presence instead?" Hakkai made a face at that sarcastic remark that I threw at him. He looked at me then smiled once again "Because he's probably painting his nails this very moment and also putting on blush on his little cheeks…placing lipstick on his pouting lips and…"

"Hey I don't need to know about his whole makeup timetable…I just want to know why his awfulness isn't here." I snapped angrily. Yaone quivered a bit at the angriness in my voice. I gave her a quick gentle smile then turned my attention back to Hakkai…

"And Goku?"

Hakkai made another face at the question and replied "Well...he's…he's…kind a vanished on us…"

I stared at him "**_Vanished_**! What do you mean **_vanished_**!"

"Well in other words…we can't find him…" Dammit… where could he have gone…maybe he's disappeared into the secret wardrobe of stuffed animals…or has escaped my room and is continuously gorging himself in the refrigerator that is in a restaurant? Or worse is running away from Mr. Bunny thinking that he's one of the…ugh Dust Bunnies…

"Well were could've he disa…oh wait I mean **_Vanished_** too?" I asked as I did that little motion with my two bunny fingers. Hakkai sweat dropped a bit…

"Well…I don't know…?"

"Hm…sure he's not in an all eat buffet? Or wondering the endless corridors of an……hm let me think…convenient store…" Hakkai looked up for a moment…

"There are no convenient stores in the complex…" I closed my eyes feeling tired all of a sudden…lack of sleep is a terrible thing… Damn those mini karaoke machines that Lirin brought out of her…

"Um…wakey wakey…we're here…"

I looked out and saw that we were directly under the London's eyes…oh dear god…

"Hey are you coming?" I jumped and looked over seeing Phillip with a smile on his face; I sweated a bit and took out a book as I buried my face into it…

"Um…no I think I'll stay here…" Phillip made a face as he came closer.

"You're coming…" he said firmly

"Wow…" muttered my pocket.

"He's **_veeeerrrry_** good" blabbed my other pocket.

"Um…no thank you…" Phillip grabbed my arm and tugged my out of the group of seats. He completely dragged me all they way out of the bus and into the line that was for the London's Eye.

_**Dear Diary**_

**_Today has been a frustrating day…Sanzo has raided my mother's make up bag and continues to place blush on his cheeks…for a bastard he sure knows how to put on makeup…He told me that there were many things to do with blush you can use it as camouflage…he was drunk okay…he even said to me 'I know how to make you feel pretty'…Feminine little bitch…is he a monk Chibi or a …_**

Sanzo looked up from my diary and slammed it shut.

"Lies!" he hissed as he flung it unto the bed.

"I never put on makeup in my life…Last time I read that…" Sanzo stared at my diary for a moment then reached his tiny deformed hands and opened it as he begun to read it again. Doku removed himself from the bathroom.

"He's not in the bathroom either"

"Hmm hmph" went Sanzo. Doku noticed the book and walked over to him as he climbed unto the bed.

"Hey what's that you reading?" Doku asked as his eyes were fixed unto the book.

"A diary…" Doku tutted

"You shouldn't be reading her diary…" There was a moment's silence between them. "Did she write anything about me?"

I sat on the seats that were currently on the capsule that were on the London's Eye. I have a confession to make…I'm afraid of heights. Phillip looked back at me as he was standing near the window.

"Hey you should see how high up we are…" I gave him one of my terrifying gazes

"Phillip don't tempt me…" Phillip shrugged as he turned his attention back to the window.

"Hey can we go see…" suggested Gojyo as he escaped my pocket and landed on my knees. I narrowed my eyes at him angrily. "No" Hakkai climbed unto my shoulder again "What's the big deal might I ask?" I sweated a bit as I closed my eyes and whispered. "I'm afraid of heights…"

"Ah…I see…"

"Oh that's awful" chimed a sadistic Yaone. Kou brought his little head up from my pocket and stared at me.

"So what…we're not going to die…"

"Why the fuck are you afraid of heights anyways?" Gojyo snapped. I opened my eyes and pouted. "Because I was pushed off the peer when I was six alright!"

"Let's see…Dear diary…today my nightmare came true…I am now suffering from irony as the kitten named Mittens is biting my leg…I am still trying to recover from that little incident that happened in the kitchen…somehow Gojyo managed to burn my underwear in the oven…how he ever got those I'll never know…Sanzo is putting on nail polish as we speak…and is putting on my favorite lipstick… for a priest that carries a gun he's a master at make up…"

Doku and Lirin began to laugh as Sanzo went bright red. Sanzo slammed the book shut and threw it away as it landed soundly on the floor. The two terrors behind him still laughing.

"I'm dying….stop it your killing me…." Lirin begged as tears were squeezing from her tightly closed eyes.

Doku slammed his fist down on the ground as he laid his whole body on the bed. "The irony…" He squealed. Sanzo frowned at them as he slowly went through his robes and brought out his small pistol.

"All witnesses must die!" he shouted as he pointed the gun, Doku and Lirin froze as the trigger was slowly being squeezed. Then when Sanzo clicked it, there was a small bang as a stick came out of the barrel with a little flag untwining saying the words 'Bang' in bold, red writing.

There was a moment of silence.

Silence still…

Until it was broken by more of Doku and Lirin's laughing as they suddenly fell off the bed. Sanzo stomped over to the diary and opened it as he began to read again.

"Oh my…the great Genjyo Sanzo invading a young woman's privacy!" Sanzo looked behind him to see a very spacey Nii and his possessed assistant Mr. Bunny behind him.

"Oh go smoke a bunny pipe"

"Now, now that's not very nice is it Mr. Bunny?" Sanzo looked up as he seen Nii cuddling his strange little rabbit with his eyes narrowed.

"Please do that some where else I'm trying to read!" Nii directed his attention back to the diary invading bastard priest.

Nii extended his hand and snatched the diary off him, as his skipped off the bed cheerfully. "Not anymore" he sang as he continued to skip.

"**_YOU CRAZY PERVERTED BASTARD GET BACK HERE WITH THE OR I'LL…_**"

"Or you'll what? Make me die of laughter from that gun with the flag saying BANG! Which was done by my handy work by the way…"

"**_THAT WAS YOU!_**" Sanzo jumped of the bed and chased after him.

"It's all right, nothing to be ashamed off…" Hakkai smiled as he continued to pat my back. "Everyone has a fear of something…" Gojyo stood up firmly on my lap, trying to look fearless.

"Not me!" The chibi Kou looked at him as he jumped down behind him.

"Gojyo…" Gojyo turned round as his antenna's twitched with his big dinner plate eyes. Kou pointed to Gojyo's hair with a mischievous grin.

"Gojyo is that a bug in your hair?"

Gojyo jumped as he started to smack his head fiercely…I never knew that he had so many tiny hands.

"**_EEEWWW BUGS, BUGS THEIR IN MY HAIR THEIR IN MY HAIR GET THEM OFF, GET THEM OFF!_**"

Then he took the liberty to jump into my pocket while he shouted

"**_SAVE ME MOMMY SAVE ME FROM THE DISGUSTING CREATURES OF HELL!_**"

Kou stared at the quivering kappa who was crying his eyes out while muttering the words '**_Bugs, bugs every where…_**' and said in a firm tone…

"**_Not me_**" he chimed in a childish tone. "Yeah right"

Right I've made two choices…look down on London or sit here and suffer more of the chattering gremlins? Hm…all of a sudden I'm guessing that walking to the window and peer down's not such a bad idea.

**To Be Continued**

**Sanzo's Guardian Angel: **Yayie I got chapter seven done I hope you all enjoy…although this isn't as funny…but on another hand at least I'm working on it… oh and another thing any Saiyuki characters you want me to Chibierise (Chibi sized) then I am open for suggestions.


	8. The Little Bird That Can

**Chibi Free Holiday Chapter Eight**

Now before I go on to this disaster…may I just warn people to not give birds rice…

And I'll just put this up too

WE CAN NOT ASURE YOU THAT ANY BIRDS WERE HURT IN THE MAKING OF THIS CHAPTER…

Poor Birds…

**The Little Bird That Can**

"ACHOO…Awww my head…" I moaned as I laid there in my bed. You must be wondering why I'm lying in my bed, well it goes like this…after we came back from the London's Eye a Chibi _managed_ to catch the cold…and passed it on to me…

It was _so _bad in fact, that I had to stay here, **Dammit we were going shopping and fucking sight seeing **

I moaned as I threw another tissue in the bin next to my bed. Awww, speaking of the terrors where are they anyways? I really hope they've disappeared into the drawer of Chang-an or what ever they call that place…

I relaxed my head on the pillow trying to enjoy the peace as it lasted. I really needed it after another incident with a very old acquaintance…good old Mr. Duck tape; you want to know what happened?

Well I wasn't actually present but I heard from my sources that obviously Sanzo was using it, you remember Simon, the one that couldn't shut his mouth? Well Sanzo thought that he could try and be a hair dresser.

Oh and one more thing we were able to find Goku, he was stuck in the freezer, obviously it seemed that he thought he saw a dust bunny and decided to hide in not realizing that the freezer was on. The only reason that it was on was because Hakkai was making fruit flavored ice pops and forgot to close the freezer door.

I slowly got up with my messed up hair and looked round the room, I looked over at the table and noticed a red giant card board box with red curtains at the front of it. I looked at it suspiciously then I seen a yellow string with a note on it. I took the note and read it carefully.

_**Pwease pwll da tring…**_

Hmmm? The writer must be trying to say, Please Pull The String…

But one must wonder what type of catastrophe that is waiting behind this innocent looking curtain, my mother has always told me that I shouldn't jump to things without thinking…but did you think I listened?

NU ER! Wrong cause if I did would you think that the Chibi's would be here right now? No I thought not…

Anyways back to the suspicious looking box. What the hell if I'm going to die might as well be now. I pulled the string as the curtain pulled away slightly. Funny all I can see is a funny looking background with a funny looking rice ball hanging by a string.

Then there was a sudden cackle which made me jump. I looked at the inside of the box to see a tiny goddess in a type of dress riding on the back of a very tired Jiroshin, yes this would happen to be Kanzeon Bosatzu the Goddess of shame and bitchiness. What was she doing on her poor body guards back anyways? Was he supposed to be a steed?

The tired Jiroshin collapsed tiredly unto the ground, the little Goddess jumped off with a fan in front of her face. I narrowed my eyes in disbelief…

"Right, what's going on here and what the hell are you doing here anyway?" I demanded

"Welcome dear Audience to the show of the season…" she ignored me I sat back down unto my bed, might as well enjoy this…I thought to myself…

"Where we will answer the most asked question who would win…The Matrix or Star Wars!" You've got to be kidding me…

"Now let the epic battle begin! BATTLE TO THE DEATH AHAHAHAHAHAHA!" laughed the chibi goddess as she jumped back onto her tired steed which was still trying to catch his breath… Kanzeon looked down on him angrily…

"Ahem…Jiroshin…my grand exit…oh bugger it…" Kanzeon jumped off and kicked the poor bodyguard of the stage as she ran after him.

Now I can see a little Hakkai walking unto the stage with a little long Matrix coat, with black glasses folding his arms and making a dominant stance.

"I am Neo…." He said then he took off the glasses and smiled cheerfully…"Played by your adorable Cho Hakkai…" then he placed the glasses back unto his face…oh my god he like…stopped smiling…then a Little Goku came out wearing a little…Star War's robe? Oh my god it's as I feared they've been stealing from the Matrix and Star wars wardrobes… I hope I don't get arrested for this…

"And I'm um…who am I playing again?" asked Goku innocently as he brought out his little blue light saber…funny it looks like a toothpick…

"You're playing Obi Wan Monkey!" Shouted a pissed off Gojyo in the background.

"Yeah I'M Obi Wan…Played by Son Goku of course…" I sat there trying my best to look interested or not to begin laughing at their little attempts to be someone else.

"FIGHT!" chimed two female voices that were coming from the back, sounded like Lirin and Yaone. Goku pointed a little deformed finger at Hakkai with his fighting face on.

"You may have the poor of the Matrax but I have the power of the horse…" okay…I think he might've gotten two words wrong there…

"It's Matrix and Force you MORON!" shouted an annoyed Sanzo as a mini paper fan came out and smacked Goku behind the head. Goku looked back with little tears darting big sparkly baby eyes over to the edge of the stage.

"That's a foul I'm taking the light saber and going home…" said Goku as he stormed off.

"But Goku that isn't your Light saber…remember…" went Hakkai as he followed after him trying to bring him back. This isn't going very well for a play isn't it? Then Hakkai peeks his head a bit out of the curtain…

"We'll be right back after these commercials…" wait commercials? Now a little Kougaiji was pushed unto the stage he was wearing a little bit of clothing, funny that looks like the clothing that Aayla would wear…and he's blue…what happened did he fall into food dye or something…?

He darted his eyes over to the edge of the stage "Forget it I'm not doing it…!"

"You better or else we'll tell everyone that you wear a pink tutu!" shouted Gojyo

"I didn't wear that!"

"Who do you think they'll believe?" Yelled Sanzo

The little prince swallowed his pride as he began to Sing "I fell so pretty, oh so pretty…" good god…I feel sorry for the little guy…I made a little giggle and then he stopped as little tears began to stream down his face.

"I feel so humiliated…WAAAAHHH!" cried Kougaiji as he ran off the stage. Oh dear… I'm guessing that I wasn't meant to laugh at that moment…but how couldn't I, I mean he was so hilarious…looking like a Star Wars Character…Now if he would have the head tails as she would have then It would make him look frightening and weird…

I suddenly had a thought and I put my head into my hands trying desperately not to show myself flinch. What would the real Aayla Secura think if she saw this? Come to think of it, what would Neo or Obi Wan think of this…?

I had no idea that I would find out soon enough…

I must remind myself to call my Niisan oh how he would love the idea of this…yes I must do…

A couple of hours later…a little smiling chibi Goku is skipping happily and innocently down the pathway with the giant rice ball that he stole from the stage in hand. You see we had to give it to him because he was just trying to eat the cardboard so that he would get to the rice ball…

"I'm so happy, oh so happy to have my darling! So I can eat you…oh so happy I am…" a little pigeon flew down gently next to Goku, seeing it Goku made a slight smile…wow I didn't know that the pigeon was bigger than him, it was just a couple of centimeters bigger.

Goku stopped with big eyes wide in surprise, is this his first encounter with a pigeon…I later wondered. However what happens next was very much unsuspected and so out of character… He looked at the innocent pigeon then his rice ball with black buttoned eyes…

He then removed a piece of his rice ball and handed it to his new feathered friend.

"Do you want a piece of my rice ball miss Pigeon…?" the Pigeon looked at it cautiously then she took the piece of it and swallowed it in one gulp. Goku smiled innocently as he skipped in joy.

"Yayie you like it!" he chimed in cuteness. Then there was a slight rumble sound…Goku stopped as he slowly turned his head round seeing the pigeons eye's going giant and it's belly rumbling viciously…like an atomic bomb, Goku's eyes went all scared and big he turned around and began to run away.

"SHE'S GONNA BLOW!" he screamed as he ran away…no seriously that did happen.

"Then how about some green tea?" asked a very busy Hakkai as he was making tea. I was still in my bed as I frowned at him angrily.

"Hakkai…I told you I'd be fine…I'd probably need a bit of fresh air…" I reassured him. Hakkai is now walking over with a cup of tea, I am amazed that a chibi his size is able to carry one cup. He made big sparkly eyes as he looked at me worryingly…

"Won't you at least take a sip of my very famous green tea?" good god I didn't know that his eyes could get so big…how can they do that? So I might as well take it since Hakkai was so kind enough to make it. I picked up in my hands and took a sip…hmmm not bad…in fact…it tastes good….really good

"Hey this is really nice tea!" I complimented Hakkai made a smile as he laughed a bit.

"I'm back!" howled a cheery Nii. Me and Hakkai turned round our eyes suddenly shooting into shock as we seen that Nii and Mr. Bunny had a dead Pigeon in their possession, I will refrain from giving out any details. I jumped up and ran into the bathroom. I felt very sick and well you can guess what happened. I opened the door and peeked my head out of the door as I looked down on them sickened.

"What the hell are you doing with that!" I shrieked

Nii just gave me his usual smile and began to explain. "I'm going to use it for some experiments…" I narrowed my eyes at him. "What type of experiments?" I asked suspiciously. Seriously you could never know what he's going to do? I mean last time he tried to bring a dead rat back to life…but then turned into a bloody mess because it exploded. And let's not forget about that incident with the squirrel, for some reason he thought it would be a great idea to give it laser eye vision, the good news is that he did it, the bad news we had no air conditioning for a year…

"Ah that's for me to know… come on Bunny-chan"

Little Nii and Mr. Bunny walked away with the pigeon in tow taking it to the drawer and closing it shut. Where the hell did he even find that thing anyways? I hope it gives him a disease.

Or better yet the plague…the black plague would be preferable…

Oh how animal lovers would be heart broken at this event…I so hope that I don't get sued or worse…sentenced to a year to be a waitress at a stripers club! No I mustn't keep looking at the bad things; it's time to think positive.

Aaagh screw it I'll just go and enjoy a cup of green tea and play mahjong…

Meanwhile else where, Goku is reunited with Sanzo and Gojyo…you want to know where they are? Well their in a giant empty office which should belong to the manager. Little Goku was looking at this huge microphone innocently. Sanzo looks at Goku, and then something so mischievous popped into his mind.

Gojyo watched the chibi monk for a moment.

"Goku you want to make an announcement?" asked Sanzo. Goku's eyes suddenly lit up as he nodded cheerfully. Wait this isn't good.

"Then you will say exactly as I tell you…okay…repeat after me…"

Meanwhile back at the room I'm busy drinking a piece of green tea then all of a sudden.

"Um…is this thing on?" said a voice that sounded remarkably like Goku's. Oh god I've finally lost it…good bye cruel world cause I have gone insane…

"Hold on a second…" a voice that sounded like Gojyo's replied, a sudden bang echoed through the speakers followed by a sound that sounded like someone screaming in pain… in my opinion it sounded like nails running down a chalk board.

"Yeah it's on…" oh I knew it…those little ugly evil trolls have taken over the loud speakers, God save us all…

"Ahem…Attention viewers…"

"THEY CAN'T SEE YOU, YOU MORON!" that was followed by the whizzing sound of a fan and then by another shriek of pain.

"Sniff…ahem…attention uuhhh…"

"Listeners would be preferable you shit for brains…"

"Stop yelling at me!... ahem…attention listeners…and especially staff for this is for you…The management regret that it has come to their attention that employees dying on the job are not falling down…THIS PRACTICE MUST STOP EMMIDIATLY as it has become impossible to distinguish death and natural movement of the staff any employee found dead in an upright position will be dropped from the payroll…who writes this stuff?"

"Must be a complete dick"

"Ahem this has been a Sanzo systems production, which will now be followed by…a new song that I have recently created…with some very realistic sound effects…ahem the song is called…'Die you Bastards…'" It was followed immediately by gunfire and the sound of things blowing up….

Oh crap….I quickly got up and ran out of the room. They're going to die a very painful death when I get my hand around their throats, wait… death is to lenient for the little trolls. While I ran down the hallway I past by several members of staff that looked like they've either seen a ghost or where huddled up in the fetal position crying for their mom… yes, death is far too lenient. I wonder if anyone knows the ancient twenty-four hour torture method?

Meanwhile as I continued on I heard that Sanzo was singing over and over again 'Die you Bastards' followed very closely by gunfire and more screaming. I could see the headlines…**Nutty manager screams trolls wrecked office** …

**To Be Continued **

**Authors**

**Sanzo's Guardian Angel**

**Jedi Master Sabbath**

**Thank you for enjoying this production oh and we are aware that we used a little bit of Starwars and Matrix...please don't hurt us...**


	9. Experiments of Doctor Nii Vs Me

**Chibi Free Holiday Chapter Nine**

Aww my aching head…Damn you Nii for your mad scientific experiments!!! God help you if I ever decide to get my hands around your neck and squeeze the life out of you…

Everything was going so brilliant until he brought out that cyborg like Pigeon and unleashed among a group of helpless toddlers

However I was told to flung this in

WE CAN ASSURE YOU THAT MANY INNOCENT TREES AND PHONE BOXES WERE SEVERLY INJURED IN THE MAKING OF THIS CHAPTER…

Hang on a second…Trees…Phone boxes … what the hell…

**Experiments of Doctor Nii Vs Me**

It's night time in the complex and I am wondering around the place out of boredom. I wanted to get a drink of Coke since I hadn't touch any of it since I got off the ship. I am un-accompanied by any of the Chibi's… well…no not really…

"Um excuse me?" I looked down into my black skull hand bag to see a little shy Yaone peeking her head out of my bag; she was blushing when I looked down on her.

"Are you sure this is alright…I mean you do need some alone time…" I gave her a glance with a smile and replied "Nah, besides you need to enjoy yourself too instead of keeping tabs on the Chibi Prince and his glutton of a sister…"

"Yes Yaone you do need to enjoy yourself more!" That would be Hakkai who has managed to climb up unto my shoulder…how the hell?

"Um…Hakkai…I thought you said that you were going to keep an eye on the little terrors…"

Hakkai gave one of his calm smiles before replying "Oh they were being annoying so I slipped some of Yaone's sleeping formulas into their drinks, they should be out until tomorrow morning"

"Oh, thanks" I said with a sudden wistful smile, _finally for the first time in months I can get a good nights sleep._

Yaone fixed Hakkai with a stern look "You gave them my sleeping potion?" Hakkai who almost looked like he was about to flinch in front of her glare, but only nodded.

Yaone's glare turned into a worried expression, I wonder what's up?

"But it's not ready yet Hakkai…" she informed him. "There were some serious side effects that I had to look into…" I glared at her shockingly…oh my god…side effects…?

"What kind of side effects? Why were you making such a thing anyway?" I asked her in a cold voice. She flinched and started twiddling her thumbs as she answered softly…

"Um well you see…I thought that they were giving you a really hard time so…I planned too…knock them out with the formula once every now and then to give you a good nights sleep"

I gave her a smile "Thanks, really…but what were the side effects"

_**Ping Pong**_

"_**Ahem…attention listeners this is your god speaking"**_

I stood there gawking at the speaker in disbelief for several seconds before the identity of this self proclaimed deity before muttering to myself in a slow and agonizing voice…

"Oh god…"

Oh shit…Yaone then jumped up unto my shoulder and patted it gently as she said to me…"Um the side effects are violent sleep walking and a serious need to eat prawns…" Then she fixed Hakkai with a look of pure anger

"DAMMIT HAKKAI!" she shrieked as she grabbed him by the collar and started to shake him violently. My kind of girl…

"I TOLD YOU NOT TO TOUCH IT UNTIL I COULD GET IT FIXED!"

"**_Attention employees your undisputed god of this earth has issued the following new rules of office…" _**That had to be Sanzo no one else could be so egotistical as to consider himself god in his own chibiful delusions.

"_**Ahem…1. A clean desk is a sign of a sick mind! **_

_**2. Tomorrow we are going to get organized so prepared to get fired!"**_

Oh shit… I ran down through the front door and into the managers office…

"**_3. The Boss my minion of this place is always right…uh…misinformed, lazy, stupid, a complete moron and prick but always right…the cheap bastard" _**

That bastard…Yaone looked at me worryingly "What you going to do?" I looked at her with an evil smile and replied "I'll think of something…in the mean time…do you know where I placed that baseball bat that my brother sent me?"

"Um I think I saw Goku leaping around with it…" Hakkai replied still recovering from Yaone's fit. DAMMIT BROTHER WHY DIDN'T YOU GIVE ME A RIFLE, A SHOT GUN…ANYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

There was a sudden ring from my mobile…I took it and answered "Yes hello?"

"You rang?" It was James…

"Um no…" then I thought…oh no Gojyo was playing with my mobile earlier for prank calls…he even pranked the prime minister…I'm so screwed… Then another thing hit me…

"WHY THE HECK DIDN'T YOU GIVE ME A SHOT GUN!"

"HEY I'M A TECH STUDENT NOT A REPRESENITIVE FOR THE BLOODY MAFIA!!"

"Listen carefully to this James…" I raised the mobile calmly so that he could hear Sanzo's announcements

"**_You will here by repeat after me…ahem…We the Willing, led by the unknowing…doing the impossible for the ungrateful little bastard!" _**I took the phone back down and said to him

"Yeah see the shit I have to deal with now a days?" I heard a sigh from the other end…

"How the heck did he get so delirious?" asked James.

"It's a long painful story don't ask…."

"**_Hm? What the devil! AAAAAAAAGGH NOT THE FACE ANYTHING BUT THE FACE AAAAAAGH!!!!"_**

I flinched as I turned my attention back to the phone as I calmly told him "Niisan I might have to call you back…later bye…"

I ran down to the office to see Sanzo inflicting pain unto a defenseless manager as he kept biting his face. Ewww…that's gotta hurt… I looked over to the corner noticing a brush, I ran over to it, right this should get the little monster off.

I began to beat Mad Maniac Chibi Sanzo with the brush "Bad Sanzo, Bad Sanzo!" I kept saying as I then smacked him really hard which resulted in him being fired out the window…it's amazing what Chibi's can do now a days, especially the maniacal ones.

"Hm?" I looked down on the manager as it would seem that he was in the fetal position and is in shock as he kept saying 'Not the Face, Not the Face' over and over again…I sighed as I threw the brush down and walked out of the office

"Now what was I going to do again? Oh yes going to the bar!" I smiled as I walked down the path way.

As I walked down to the bar with Yaone still arguing with Hakkai. Aww man they sound like a married couple…god dammit!

Now as I was walking to the bar I notice a little whimpering noise…hmm…for some reason that noise sounds very familiar. I turned my head slowly round to see a well. You know one of those many wishing wells that people use to wish for something and it was supposedly to be true?

I wonder if I could make a wish so that the Chibi's would go away…but then again I knew that it wouldn't work because I've already reached the breaking point to insanity and that if I do make a wish I'd probably be praying to any religious figure begging them to take the Chibi's away then people will start looking at me and think that I would be insane and then call 999 and then I'd be in a straight jacket and hauled away by the weird looking bastards in white coats and ugly looking glass and will suffering by being forced to forever play a game of chess…

Well anyways I walked over to the well and examined it, until I looked inside of the well, I jumped as I took a step back, flinging the two Chibi's off my shoulder and making them land unto the ground.

Then I swallowed my courage and looked into the well again placing a serious face on. "Simon…why are you in a well?"

Yes it was Simon Duddy that Sanzo terrified to death, he was now quivering in the belly of the well, I'm surprised that there wasn't any water…Simon popped his quivering head out of the well and replied as he hesitated.

"I…Is…Is the Dust Bunny King around?" My eyes suddenly went into a dark demonic look as I turned my head around. **_Sanzo…_** who else would try the old Dust Bunny routine? First it was a joke to scare Goku…then it was the ghost stories…then the masks… but now it's gone too far…

"And his white fluffy minion?" Wait a minute white fluffy minion? I looked at him with my eyes a bit in confusion but still try and keep a serious face. Hakkai and Yaone are now standing at the bottom of the well; I looked down to see Hakkai giving me the thumbs up.

That means that he's not going to cause any trouble…because if he does then that means that he's going to be thrown into the disposal bin…

"Um…Simon what did this fluffy minion look like?" I asked politely trying to keep a smile on my face. Simon quivered as he slumped himself further into the well's bowel. I think he knew that I wasn't all smiles and laughs…

Wise little man…

Then I just asked politely "Was it a rabbit?" Simon shocks his head violently and yelled "It wasn't a rabbit it was a bunny!!" I sweat dropped a bit at that outburst.

"Um they're really the same thing Simon……Um…Simon…" I directed my eyes down to see a little Hakkai with a huge banner saying 'It must Be That Maniac' then Yaone piped up with another banner saying 'Nii' I nodded as I returned my smile towards the shivering moron that has hidden himself away in the world of torment…

"You sure you haven't been drinking too much Coca-Cola?" I grabbed Simon's arm as I immediately decided to pull the poor soul out of the well.

"Well now that you've mentioned it…I have been drinking a lot…" I nodded as I decided to go into psychiatrist mode. "Yes it is very horrible to become a glutton one of the many sins…from the horrible seven…how about we get you some coffee?" I suggested brightly.

Meanwhile some where in the depths of the bar is an acquaintance with old friends who are now in the form of violent sleep walking…except Gojyo of course because of the moment he heard sexy feminine voices he finally snapped out of it and is now rummaging through the mountains and piles of the striper's sexy underwear and silky bra's…

Kougaiji is still in the sleep walking stupor but has now found him self gulping down a giant glass of rum… followed by three tequila's and one Budweiser…how I know this I had a very reliable source…known to you as Ms. Good and Wonderful Lirin talking in her sleep … she does that now a days…

Goku on the other hand is still running around with the baseball bat hitting many innocent seagulls…he's going to regret later on I will assure you…

Doku is trying to stop Goku from damaging anything else…you must be wondering how he did that…Hm…should I tell you Before or After he got hit by Goku's mighty whacks?

…Well I **_would_** but then it would take a long time…

"Well…you sure you don't want pretzels with that Simon?" I asked as the traumatized Simon lifted up a cup of coffee and gulped it down. I never realized how Simon has loved coffee so much? He's just gulped down thirteen cups full and is now going into his fourteenth...

It was really interesting in how many of them he has gulped down…I couldn't believe it myself…I wonder if he has won the world record for the world's biggest drinker? Well now that I mention it, Simon has always been rumored to be an alcoholic and won in shot matches…What an age we lived in…

…You must be wondering where the little 'Duo of Crusade and Chibiness are?' well if you must know their off trying to find the trouble makers of destruction…

Well he seems to be alright now…might as well leave him before he goes into his bastard persona of a Chibi punching bag…

"I'll be leaving you now…and…make sure not to drink too much Coke again kay?" Or too little…you brainless fool with a peanut for a brain…

Although I must give him a little credit…at least he's playing nicely with the Chibi's…although I have convinced him that they were hallucinations because of his over dose of Coca cola amounts.

He didn't react but shivered a bit, he's slowly nodding his head now…I turned round and left as I excited through the door.

**_GRAB_!!**

I jumped as I looked down to see a dirtied face staring up at me with black shadowed eyes, messy brown hair, in blue jeans, black Metallica T-shirt and a black leather jacket with dark shoes and a beer bottle stuck in his left hand.

I narrowed my eyes; yes I would happen to know who this guy is…

"Denver…OH my god…what happened to you?!" I snapped as I looked down on him shocked and terrified. I didn't know what he replied because it was all slurred…I sighed as I bended down and hauled him up to his feet.

"You know you shouldn't really drink…" oh but how I envied the smut…he's able to get himself drunk and talk about seeing nothing but the Pink Elephants dancing all over the place, not only that but he's started smoking a couple of months ago…Oh how I envied him for not being able to see little deformed creatures with glittering eyes and little deformed hands gripping a microphone and announcing world domination and have called themselves God…

Damn drunks and hookers…I wish I was drunk…

"I vaw da wie wink wlephants…." I looked puzzled…trying my best to translate the foreign language of alcholisium…

Let's see what my translator can translate shall we?

_I saw the Pink Elephants_…that's not surprising…what else would you expect from a drunk teen…?

"Dand the Wittle whote bwnny woo…"

_And the little White Bunny Too……._Wait a minute…**Little White Bunny!! **Oh crap he can see them!!

"Weah smut!!! Twhink you can kweep mwe from veeing de price Garls, fhame on you!!" shouted a high squeaky voice. I froze for a minute, drunk still in a drunken stupor to say a thing like that, that doesn't sound like something that Denver would say, course he's drunk, but not that drunk to sound so maniac-ish violent.

I slowly directed my head over to a poor defenseless phone box to see a drunken Chibi shouting at it at the top of it's lungs, you must be wondering which Chibi it is? Well I'll give you a hint the initials are S. G, No it's not Goku…he's not that much of a drinker of the hellish liquid known to most as alcohol...Yes it was Gojyo…

What is he doing? He has clung himself to a phone box and is putting gigantic teeth marks into the metal, how the hell can he do that?! I knew it; I knew something like this would happen!!

Where's Hakkai when you need him?

"Gojyo!! Leave that innocent Phone box alone!! What it ever do to you?!" shouted another squeaky voice. Speak of the devil, Gojyo jumped off the phone box and ran off towards a tree, he stopped for a minute looking up a\t it in silence…minutes passed…silence still…then suddenly…

"Wake Away Me Wink wills yeah…ARRRGH!!" Holy cow…I couldn't even believe what I'm seeing…if I was asked to write a police report…I mightn't be able to do it…but I can yet see more headlines…

_**Ugly Looking Troll decapitates Innocent Trees and bits into huge Phone boxes…**_

It's amazing how big his mouth can grow into; seriously it's about the size of my fist, bigger even…

Damn Yaone and her stupid sleeping formula and curse Hakkai for giving it to the team of maniacs in the first place…

Things can't get any worse than this…

"AAAAAGGGGGHHHH!!" I jump as I spotted a little terrified Goku running for dear life, baseball bat still in chibiful hands as he continued to dash and constantly bump into things along the way as he looked behind him, kid should consider himself to look…

"Ugh…Goku…." My eyes followed the little chibi as he ran off, still screaming, I looked over to see what he was running from. My eyes widened in shock.

"**For god sake it's that fucking retarded looking pigeon again!! I warned that little demented psychotic doctor to get rid of it!!" **I yelled as there was now fire appearing in my eyes. Why couldn't he be a nice little chibi and do what I said kindly, but no…he has to set it free and let it fly all over the place!!

I'll deal with the soon to be dead Chibi psycho later…

I dropped Denver unto the ground, lucky for me he was still at it as he kept muttering the words of the alcoholic.

"Oh wook a tird…" Denver mutters as he raised his finger to the cyborg pigeon. Damn drunk…

"Goku!!" I screamed as I ran after the little chibi monkey who is now climbing a tree, moron doesn't he know that Pigeons can fly?

"Goku what are you doing?" I asked him as I looked at him climbing up the tree; he was at my level now. The bat has vanished, where has it gone? Goku turned his head towards me as he replied "I'm climbing this tree…"

"Why are you climbing the tree?" Goku made a confident pose as he answered

"Because everyone knows that Pigeons can't climb trees" I sighed as I slapped my hand unto my head.

"Goku, those are dogs you're thinking of…pigeons don't need to climb they can bloody fly!!" For god sake you clueless demented Chibi ape use that small brain of yours and think for once.

All colour in Goku's face fades away…has he turned into a statue now? He's falling apart. Literally…I raise my hand as all the pieces crumbled into my palm. How can they do that? That is technically impossible that goes against everything that idiotic doctors and sciencetist's have made logic out off…

Forget it I was never good at science…

"Goku…" Goku pieced himself together again as he looked up at me..."Where's my baseball bat?" Goku shuffled his small hand into his pocket as he searched and searched…then after three long agonizing minutes he tugs out the baseball bat from his small pocket.

What the fuck…

"Here you go!" piped Goku; I took the baseball bat as I settled him back on the tree, I looked at the demented failed experiment of Doctor Nii's.

Ease bat back, wait for pigeon to come into smacking range, 2 meters, 1 meter, 50 cm, SMACK!!

Raise hand to see how far it's gotten too…the Demented Cyborg Pigeon flying incredibly far, so far in fact, that I have lost sight of it, but I swear I thought I saw it colliding into a very large tree, a tree that was much more bigger than me…nah must be my imagination…

"Hey!!" I jump as I turned round, oh god no…It's a boy I know from class…why out of all the people I know why does it have to be Sam?

"Why did you just hit a defenseless bird with a baseball bat?" Think of a reasonable yet understandable explanation for this situation to explain to a normal person who does not see Chibi's…

"Oh but you don't understand that wasn't a bird…" Sam gives me a suspicious look as he frowned at me.

"It's a new type of baseball that I bought in the gift shop…" Sam looks at me stupefied eyes wide with shock and confusion.

"That happens to resemble a pigeon…" he asks

"Yup" I smile, trying my best not to hit myself or hit Sam with the bat and hope that he forgets about me hitting a retarded cyborg pigeon into the dark abyss of craziness and insanity…

He still looks at me suspiciously, why do I get the feeling that he doesn't believe me?

**To Be Continued**

**Sanzo's Guardian Angel: **Sorry that I didn't update this chapter as soon as I could, I had lots of coursework to hand in this year, so I was actually relieved when I had tie to do this, also I had a cold so I had to stay home yesterday…, Oh and I hope you know that I've placed my latest story on Fan Fiction, Blood Stained Memories I hope you'll read it, if you're interested that is...Until the next chapter…see yeah (smiles)


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